The Lesson I Did Not Learn

My parents are in their mid-eighties. They have lived through a lot in their lifetime and managed to survive it all...however, let it be known that their life experiences have formed them into who they are today. Isn't that true of all of us?

My parents try to keep up with the times...actually they do quite well for their age. They can work a TV remote...a VCR machine (I know this is a little dated, but still pretty recent given the 80+ year span)...and a computer. My sisters and I just gave them a cell phone "for emergencies" which, thankfully, they are willing to try to learn to use. They have learned to operate the chair glide just installed on the stairway to their apartment...and are experiencing a new found freedom. They still have not tried to tackle the dishwasher (having never had one growing up...I could not live without mine) and therefore use the racks to store their snacks and plastic containers...given there is very limited cabinet space!!! They are resourceful.

Which brings me to the reason for this blog of thought today.

My mom was telling me yesterday about a pair of shoes that she took to the shoemakers...I really don't think they actually "make" shoes anymore, but the repair part is almost a lost art! Anyway...this particular pair of shoes needed to be dyed. My curiosity got the best of me when I heard this, as the only time I ever dyed shoes was "back in the day" to match a gown...for a prom...or wedding I was in. So...why did she need to dye shoes? Well...Mom said that "the color on the sides of the shoes was beginning to 'rub off' because, they were, imported shoes." IMPORTED SHOES??!! I guess she means from China or Japan. What a character!

See...here's the lesson I never learned. My "imported shoes" would probably end up in the trash if the "color was rubbed off" and I would be off to Payless for a new pair...where Mom takes the thrifty approach and wants to salvage what she has instead of replacing with new. You must remember your mom or grandmother washing out bread bags...reusing foil and wrapping paper... and keeping every plastic cool whip or margarine container for left overs...just to name a few.

I never had to stand in line for hours waiting for bread or cheese. I never had to share a pair of shoes with my sisters...although I did wear all their hand-me-downs! I never had to walk the neighborhood peddling peanuts that my mom spent hours roasting so that we would have money for groceries. I never had to catch eels in the river, skin them and cook them for dinner. Yuck...that thought really creeps me. But my parents did.

So every little thing they have is appreciated. They waste little and "want" for even less. I grew up in a wasteful generation...where there was always "plenty more where that came from." I was not spoiled or rich...just not "needy". Because...my parents were resourceful.

I did not learn how to be resourceful...I just learned how to "have".

My Cheeks Hurt

Have you ever laughed so hard that your cheeks actually hurt? Well, I just returned from a week of belly laughing with 4 of my dear high school friends, Gerrie, Roseann, Connie and Theresa. We all met at Gerrie's home...near San Francisco...to celebrate our "double nickle" birthdays...and the week was filled with both laughter and tears...some tears caused by laughter!

I love my girlfriends...they are good listeners...they have experienced many of the same things that I have as an "adult" (I think we are officially in that category now at 55)...they like to eat...they like to shop...they like to pose for pictures... they like to sing...they like to be goofy...they like to hug...and they like to laugh...A LOT!!!

We shared some leg-crossing...cheek hurting...belly laughter moments. Like the night we bought our matching tee shirts that said "Group Therapy" and posed for pictures wearing big red wax lips! Or in the limo (read on) singing theme songs from old TV shows like Green Acres, Gilligan's Island and Patty Duke. Or at the well-known comedy show "Beach Blanket Babylon" in San Francisco. Or reading the "Pat, the Husband" book (a parody on the "Pat the Bunny" book we all read to our kids), a b'day gift from Connie, I might add. Or posing for pictures and telling Ger's son to "take one without pants". Now...you ask...what is that all about? Really...quite innocent...I assure you. Ger had gotten us matching shirts that said "Old Navy San Francisco" (coral in color)and we all slipped them on right away. None of our pants matched the shirt. So...we wanted Jeff to take the picture from the waist up...the request just came out wrong!!

We also had some memorable moments this past week..."hot tubbing" in Ger's heated pool...bumping into an actual photographer who (using all 5 cameras) "posed" us for pictures at the coast saying he was helping is to look thinner (what was that all about?...we look darn good for a bunch of old ladies!)...riding in a limo (Ger surprised us!) through the wine country and stopping at a few vineyards along the way (meeting a group of women from Wisconsin where - in their words - "the men are men and the women are men")...shopping until our feet, knees and shoulders ached (that could have something to do with the "55 factor")...riding on a cable car (our driver claimed it was his first day)...and touring San Francisco with our guide, Patrick (who can be seen as a fireman in the new show "Trauma"). Creating perfect memories from a perfect week.

I can not wait for the next time we get together. We are thinking about Boston and Vermont...Connie's stomping grounds...maybe two years from now.

I hope by that time my feet, knees, shoulders and cheeks will be rejuvenated!

OK!!!!! I GIVE UP!!!!!

Now, if you really know me well you know that those words rarely come out of my mouth! Just ask my honey...he can attest to many arguments...ahemmmm...slight differences of opinions...that we have had over the years where I just have to have the last word...and the next to the last...and the one before that...and before that...etc....etc...etc. Or, you could go ask Alice...isn't that a song???...who I worked with for 5 years at the best job I ever had...church secretary. Alice can attest to the fact that if we had something go wrong in the office...or couldn't figure out something on the computer...I would dig and dig and dig until I got a resolution. I am not sure if this is a personality trait to brag about or not!!!

Well...I give up! I spent the last 2 hours at my pool battling with leaves. Yes, I know...we do live in the middle of the woods...and yes, I know...it is fall...and yes, I know...no one is even swimming anymore...BUT HEY!!!...what the heck happened to summer???? Where did it go???? Did I miss it???? Instead of a warm sunny...even Indian Summer day...I am out there in a sprinkling rain...with a gusting wind...skimmer in hand...trying to remove all the leaves. Out five...in seven...out three...in two...out four...in nine! You do the math...it is a LOSING BATTLE!!

Even Sebastian is out of breath!!!

Time to call the pool guys and get the cover installed for the winter. I was really trying to keep it open so that my Minnesota friends could enjoy a little dip in the heated pool when they visit in October. Sorry to disappoint, guys. However...the hot tub WILL stay open until the end of October.

I certainly think I can manage the leaves in that!!!

The Quietness of Fall

Unlike my cool cyberfriends Sarah and MaryLisa, I do not seem to blog regularly anymore. I guess my life was a bit more eventful when I was packing, moving, stepping over contractors and unpacking. Now my life is just...quiet.

Quiet is good...quiet is restful...quiet is peaceful...quiet is calming...BUT quiet can be lonely.

I have read more books this past summer than I have read in the past 5 years! Love it...love to read...love to get "lost" in a book. Have lots of quiet time to do it. So what am I complaining about? Sounds like Sarah and MaryLisa would kill to have time to sit and quietly read a book...uninterrupted...but instead their moments are filled with "back to school blues". I remember those days well.

But my little birds have long since dropped out of the nest. Their school years are a distant memory...found only in little books marked "School Days" which I lovingly filled each year with pictures and mementos from K-8th grades. The high school years I chose not to commemorate in this way...except for Will's acting/musical accomplishments and Carrie's basketball. Sorry Leigh and Jessie...but I AM equally as proud of you!!!

So...does fall make me think of bus stops...new teachers...new friends...school shopping...school lunches...PTA?? You betcha! But I would not trade places with my friends who are young mom's for anything in the world!

After all, I have four beautiful little birds that have grown into strong, independent adults, a husband who I adore...and with whom I get to spend some of my quiet time, two of the most precious grandlittle birds in the world, a beautiful home which is truly a BlessInn', and many friends I have collected over the years who are scattered across the country...and even in Australia.

Life is good...and quiet.

Shhhhhhhhhhhh...I can hear the leaves falling to the ground.

Silver and Gold

My cyberfriend, Sarah, blogged a few weeks ago about friends, old and new. She recently moved from her home town...lifetime home town, I might add...to not only a new town, but a new state. I know just how she feels as I moved to MN in August of 2000. It can be traumatic...it can be frustrating...it can be unbearable...and your friends...new and old...help you to get through. It is what you make it!

When I left my hometown area of PA/NJ, I left behind family and lifetime friends also...friends of "gold; my childhood friend, Lisa-I do not have a memory of my childhood that does not include her; my adult friend, Jean-we became friends when our boys were toddlers and we worked through a lot of life crisis together; and all of those dear friends in between...buckets overflowing with "gold". I have been very blessed.

I accessorized with gold jewelry before my move to MN. I did not care much for silver. I had a few pieces that I donned occasionally, but my favorite by far was gold. Very conservative pieces. I would never mix the two...a fashion faux pas for certain!

After my move in 2000 I began to fill my buckets with "silver". Once again I have been very blessed! I made many "new" lifetime friends, those that will be a part of me forever. Those that have touched my life in ways that have helped me to become a better person, a better friend.

And during these years I began to accessorize with silver jewelry. Actually, I became obsessed with silver jewelry and began to purchase some very "funky" and fun pieces. I rarely wore my gold jewelry anymore. It sat in my jewlery box-unused for the most part. And I still would never mix the two.

After 8 1/2 years I moved back to my hometown area. It was a bittersweet event. I was thrilled to be back "home" but broken hearted at leaving all of my dear friends behind, once again. I left with buckets overflowing, but this time with "silver".

Here it is, 8 months later, and I now have the best of two worlds! Not only do I get to travel back to MN quite regularly and visit all my "new" friends, but some of them have begun to be transferred to the PA/NJ area, and I see them on a regular basis. They have been to our home and have met my "old" friends, and the two have blended quite nicely. What could be better than this!!

And now, strange as it may seem, I have learned to blend my silver and gold jewelry. I have found a few pieces that are made from both metals, and I wear them all the time. They really are quite beautiful together...they compliment each other well.

Funny how it took me so long to figure that out. Now, I can not even imagine wearing one without the other. Just gold...or only silver...not anymore!! Two precious metals...many precious friends...complimenting each other...completing me!

GPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!

Our granddaughter, Cailyn, is the smartest little 21 month old I know! I am certain that no other child can match her wit or vocabulary!

We are blessed to have all four of our little birds home visiting, along with our two grandlittle birds, Carter and Cailyn. Carter is just adorable at a mere 8 weeks old. He has grown so much, right along with my love for him. All you grandmas out there understand this concept!

And Cailyn is...well...just perfect! I just can't get enough of her. I can sit for hours and just watch her...learning...wheels turning...absorbing life. She is beyond delightful...she is just heaven on earth!

My honey and I have watched her learning every one's name...all of which she repeats quite clearly...along with her ABC's! I am telling you...smart!!! She can say Leigh, Uncle Will and Grandy (that's me!) if we ask her to "say....". But Jessie and GP (that's my honey!) she says without prompting.

My honey came into the house last evening...after having worked on the farm all day...and Cailyn heard the door and shouted with glee "GPPPPPPPPP!" I must say that the look on his face was of sheer joy! My heart just smiled!

Nothing warms the heart more than hearing your grandchild say your name because they KNOW who you are! Life just keeps getting better and better.

We will continue making memories this week at the "BlessInn" counting all of our "blessin's" along the way!

Say Cheese :)

I love to take pictures. I have gotten much better at it since my honey bought me a new camera.

I never run from a good Kodak moment. I have taken countless pictures...pictures of the "Money Pit"...pre-construction...and during construction...and the now "BlessInn"...the finished (almost) project. I have taken pictures of Cailyn and Carter...many, many pictures! I have taken pictures of the deer in our yard...just like you, ML!

I know that I will be taking many more pictures in the future...like when all the "little birds"...and "grandlittle birds"...are here in just a few short weeks. These pictures will be tucked away...and at some future gathering...pulled out...dusted off...and looked at...and all the memories will come flooding back. That's what pictures are for, right?

I have seen other people taking pictures of many things over the years...things they want a memory of. Things like animals at the zoo...large historical buildings...beautiful sunsets...old cars...new cars...pets in silly outfits...family members...flowers...beaches...mountains...you get the idea.

Today I saw a rather bazaar Kodak moment. I still can not figure out why this event had to be documented...why this person needed to have this memory. Not only was it strange that this person had a camera with her...but even more mind boggling as to why she chose this particular place to use it.

Today I saw a woman taking a picture of her very cute little girl...at the movie theater...in the ladies room!! As I walked in, the little girl was standing by the sink and the mom said "say cheese!"

My brain snapped a picture of that and I am afraid it will be a memory for a long time. Some things you just want to forget.